full moon
ever heard that song?.. it's funny how when you hear a song (especially one you like) you automatically try to relate it to your life, just to see how close it comes... kinda like horoscopes or psychic "predictions," even though the only predictions they predict are things that already happened.

dang
i just had one of them "reality realizations"... it's about my job (but i guess it could be for any job). well, in my case, i figure i am too inexperienced (or rather too nice) to do it properly. i get too tied up in the fact (or should i say dream) that i could make a change in the world... you know, help kids wanna get smarter. dammit, i wish i didn't worry about the children i tutor. but that'd be like saying i'd be fine if they grew up to be rude and impolite and close-minded... maybe head down the path that leads straight to everything their parents don't want them to grow up to be. if my sister or dad got a chance at doing my job, they would be quitting more than educating. i think that's where both of them are alike. they'd both say "if you don't like it get out" and not give two shits about what could happen to anyone else if you quit. not like i carry my job on my shoulders that severely, but it's hard to be in a line of work where you're just supposed to help little kids, but their other "parental figures" just seem to be countering all your efforts... wait have i complained about this before?...